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[kobes]

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koby



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[kobes]

Not on the surface, no, but there are all sorts of histories and traditions -- old farmer's almanacs, festivals and birthdays and deathdays. I'll figure something out.

I won't. I can keep a secret. [Haha....hah.]

Does it only count if
Well. What makes it count? What are the parameters?

[holyposition]

"Three weeks, interesting. There might be a birthday. I better do more research."

???

If you're being physically intimate, it counts for me. Hawk doesn't count blowjobs.

[kobes]

CLEARLY it's a significant date to Hawk, otherwise he wouldn't have specified.
Also it's interesting to see when famous people were born!
Did you know Abraham Lincoln was born three months and one day before me??? That's practically the same day. [Koby.]

Really? That brings my number down.
I think it counts, though. So --
Seven. All here.

[holyposition]

I don't think it is. And I thought you didn't even share the same calendar as us.

Really? In 3 months?
Sorry
that sounded bad. it's fine. it seems like they want us to.





Who?

[kobes]

Not the same years, but the same months, for...some reason. And the seasons are vaguely the same, in some areas. Also, apparently, some of the same holidays?

I'd never done ANYTHING before, remember, I hadn't really had time.
Plus a lot of it was influenced by this place. My first time at Underworld I was
Sort of all over the place. It was nice, really nice.



You first.

[holyposition]

Do you have Christmas?

Okay, fine.

My first was a junior chaplain in college, his name was Bob. A couple more bad hookups, and then Hawk. Luci, Quentin, Lestat, and you.

[kobes]

Yes, actually. Which is confusing.

I don't know what a chaplain is, but college -- you were my age. How much later did you meet Hawk? You hadn't mentioned exactly how long you've known each other. [The other names get filed away, carefully, to cross-check his notes with, later. Not to tell anyone, just -- Danny might not be the only dangerous person here.]

Hao, Bellamy, Erik if it counts without getting undressed, Quentin, you, Luffy sort of and
Shanks.

Wait, does it count if they aren't guests? Not the Balfours, some of their friends. I think.

[holyposition]

With no Christianity?

A chaplain is a representative of the church, I went to a Catholic college. They were there for spiritual guidance. So the junior chaplain is like an assistant. I was 19, then. I met Hawk when I was 22.

They count. What did you do with Erik without either of you taking your clothes off? Just rub on each other?

[kobes]

It's for some sort of World Government reason, it's above my pay grade.

I see. Like a church...officer, almost. Was he nice? Was IT nice?

After you left the board game party, yes. More or less. There were handcuffs involved, it was all very interesting.

[holyposition]

He was really sweet. And it was nice, I guess, for a couple of inexperienced, scared boys figuring it out. I told you how it is at home, nobody tells you how it's supposed to work between men. We saw each other for about four months before he broke it off. He was so ashamed of himself, every time. He couldn't handle it anymore.

He cuffed you?

[ Hot. Authoritative. Tim's weakness for older men strikes again. ]

I've used ropes. And makeshift things like ties, belts. I like it.

[kobes]

You did, yeah. I'm glad it was nice. I mean
For a little while. You deserve that. Someone to be nice to you.
How DOES it work? With two men? I mean
Men like you?

He has this power, metal manipulation? So he did it without even touching them, kept them above my head and
Well.
It was very impressive, how he could do that at the same time.

That makes sense. For you, I mean. [Get perceived, Tim.]

[holyposition]

Thanks. I mean, I have that now. You and Quentin are nice to me.
but hold on, how did you find the edging book before the one about anal sex?

do you think he likes brunettes?

If I ask what you mean, you're gonna say something rude.

[kobes]

It's not EXACTLY the same. It's scary, the first time. I mean
I was pretty drunk the first-first time, but the first sober time was a little scary.
It helps to have someone who's kind, which I did, both times.
I'll get there! I have a lot of books!

Would you like me to ask him? Or just go ahead and introduce you?

No, not mean, just
You like giving control. I think it makes you feel safe. It's not bad.

[holyposition]

Yeah, it is. We were both nervous, he was really clumsy. It took so long to get ready that I was sure my roommate was gonna come back. I was in a dormitory, in college. He would NOT have kept it a secret if he knew.
We both cried after. Not because it hurt. We were going to Hell, we thought.

no don't! I talked to him once and put my foot in my mouth.

You're not wrong, I guess. Most of the time. It's hard to feel safe like that with someone you barely know. Other times I just don't
want the pressure, of having to choose? it's hard to explain.

[kobes]

You had a ROOMMATE, even? That's very daring. [He's?? Actually so proud of you, Tim, wow, good job.]
You don't still think that, right? That you're going to Hell?

I can be very normal about it! I can say "this is my friend Tim who is very normal, just like me."

No, that makes sense. You have a hard time turning your mind off. [Pot, kettle.] Sometimes you don't WANT to think about every possibility and make sure you've prepared for it. You want to just
Lose yourself, a little.

[holyposition]

It's complicated. I don't know.

Yeah, do exactly that, that'll work. 😛

Something like that. I have trouble with only losing myself a little, though.

[kobes]

Oh.
I'm sorry, I know it's complicated. We don't need to talk about it, unless you want to.

It could! You don't know until you try. The worst thing that'll happen is he'll think I'M weird, and I can live with that.

Is that a bad thing, sometimes? We're not going anywhere, it might be okay to get lost every once in a while. Especially if it helps with everything else.

[holyposition]

I just dont know. I thought it was why I was here. But this place encourages it. They don't care if it's a man, or you're not married, or you're in love or not. That's not what I was taught. Those were all sins.
I told myself it was okay with Hawk because I loved him but what about the rest?

It can be. I get so lost in it that I can't see reason.

[kobes]

Those don't seem like very logical rules. What if you don't love them until after? Or you love them, but it's in a different way? Or you're married to someone but you DON'T love them?

Then maybe doing it with someone you feel safe with is best. There are things I don't think I could do unless I really, really trusted the person.

[holyposition]

That's what makes it confusing. I don't feel bad about what I've done with you and Quentin. But I don't love you. At least not like that.

I just don't know. It's hard.

That's what I've done. Except for when the food gets drugged.

[kobes]

Good. I don't either. I mean
I liked it? I liked it. In case you were worried, I don't regret it. But I don't love you in quite the same way either.

It is. And you're hard on yourself.

Except for when the food gets drugged. I WILL say Erik had fantastic manners. And he's very
Substantial. If that matters to you.

[holyposition]

I don't regret it either. I thought I might, the first time. But it didn't feel bad afterwards.

That isn't...the MOST important. But it doesn't hurt.
Well
Unless you're impatient

[kobes]

Good. I mean
You deserve that. To not feel bad about it.

Well, obviously. I've gotten THAT MUCH via osmosis. You can be too impatient in my circumstances too, but it's
Different.

[holyposition]

It's not about deserve.

You could try it for yourself if you wanted to know the difference.

[kobes]

It is to me. There has to be SOME justice in the world or I'll lose my mind.

Oh.
It's so much quicker the other way I hadn't
Really considered that.

I mean, not as the one um
Receiving.
Giving is a different story.