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[kobes]

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koby



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Comments

[holyposition]

I believe him. It's not that. It's that I want to give him more than that without hurting Hawk and I don't know how.

[kobes]

Ahhhhhh. I see.

It's not simple. I wish I could say it was, but its not, even in my situation.

[holyposition]

Quentin gets jealous?

[kobes]

No, not him. Me.

[holyposition]

You do?

Sorry. I just thought you sailors were so laid back about everything.

Of who?

[kobes]

Sometimes, yes. I try to focus on what I have now, but sometimes I think too much. I compare myself.

Usually I end up lacking, somehow. I could be stronger or braver or more confident. I could give everyone I love everything they need, but
That's not realistic.

[holyposition]

You know Quentin doesnt think you lacking in anything, don't you?

[kobes]

I do. And I trust that. But I wish I were better, still.

It's not quite the same thing, but
Having relationships is inherently complicated, is what I mean.

[holyposition]

Better at what?

You're right about that. It doesn't feel complicated with Harry, though. When I'm with him, before I think about any broader context.

[kobes]

Everything. I could be better at everything.

Good. That's what makes it worth it, when the good parts outweigh that part of your mind that just wants to figure out how everything's going to fail. It doesn't make it go away, but
It does make it worth it. I promise.

[holyposition]

You and everyone else, Koby.

I know it is. It has been. This is good. Thank you.

[kobes]

Well, you have me there. I guess feeling inadequate is a pretty common experience.

You're welcome. I'll still keep an eye on them, just in case, but I really don't think you have anything to worry about.